Its raining...
I have my windows open and I am sitting here typing away trying to forget that I just got a notice about my license being suspended. Is this really how my new year is supposed to start?
The up side?
I got my first 3 books from the list I am starting to read from:
Little Women
A tale of Two Cities
Short Stories (which is a compilation of short stories written by famous writers)
The latter not necessarily being on the "list" but I could not resist getting it.
The other thing that is bringing me comfort is that he came to visit today. Right now the gloomy weather has over taken him and the hum/dripping sound the rain is making on my window has lulled him to sleep. I am sitting across from him mesmerized. From here I can hear him breathing. It always makes me smile to myself how I notice that when he is falling asleep he has a small grin on his face. I wonder what that is all about?
Its been a long time since we've known each other and we've been through more than most. Right now the status of "us" is still up in the air and I am learning to be ok with just calling him "friend". He's more than that of course. In so many ways he's like the perfectly shaped complete opposite of me that makes more sense than anything else I know. And in other ways I wonder why he is still in my life. I guess you can never really know.
When he's around I feel as if the missing piece of the puzzle was found. Like this one time I was building a puzzle with my niece. We got all the way to the end when we discovered that there was a piece missing. She was sad that it was not finished but I told her, "well its only one piece". She looked at me with her 5 year old eyes like if I was crazy. Even one so young knows that its not complete until you find the missing piece. I surrendered and walked away, conformed with the fact that it was "nearly done". But my little niece could not stand the thought of leaving it unfinished.
A few minutes later I heard her calling out my name in excitement and yelling, "I found it!" When I went back to her room she was standing proudly over the finished puzzle and said, "Now its finished!" Well, that's what I feel like when he comes around. Its weird. And there are times, I will admit, that even with him around there still seems to be something missing. I know what it is.
But here we are. Two people who love to be with and without each other LOL. Listening to rain.
What will this new year bring me I wonder. How many days just like this will I have? Its raining, my license is on a mission, and he is sleeping quietly.
hmmmmmm....guess I'll start reading my books now
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