Starting over, starting again for that matter is never easy. I am sitting here in a place most people would hate but I actually enjoy...the laundromat. I find the humming of the machines, the scent of detergent and how no one really bothers you really nice. Plus you can wash all your clothes in multiple machine all at once! Yes you do spend a small fortune...I know I have.
Here I am washing the clothes that I will be wearing from now on. I've had these clothes for a while. But now with everything changing its almost as if I will be wearing them for the first time. I new this day would come. I knew that one day this little bird would have to flap her wings and take flight...but damn...I didn't expect the swift kick in the ass to get me to flap!
I realize that its all ok. This may just be what I am going to do from now on. Sit here, alone, listing to the sound of these giant washing machines and dryers and blogging. I must admit that I am scared. My plans haven't exactly gone the way I wanted them to. And I find myself asking God, "why". But that would be pointless cause he never answers in the speed I want him too nor does the answer ever come the way I want....its just his way lol.
I have tried not to be bitter about it...not to be upset. Its hard. As I pack away the things that I can take for now I can't help but look through the things I don't want to leave behind. There are so many memories there. Too many. But its time for me to say goodbye. I hate goodbyes. I've been wanting to get out for so long and now that its here I just want to hold on for a few more minutes...but I can't....and I won't.
So here is to the next chapter....no....the new book....Chapter 1.
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